First off - let's go with ME - I'm a cold and evil woman for not posting JOY.
Monday was President's day. I was busy celebrating because no matter what happens, George Bush will not be president next year.
Or I was taking a nap.
Or I was learning how to raise glittery unicorns.
Or I was busy recovering from the abject embarrassment of having one manhattan too many the night before and for the first time ever - totally losing my balance and FALLING into a nice man that I was flirting with. (For the grammarpants among you - the nice man with whom I was flirting)
Or I was in astronaut training.
I'll let you guess which of the above is true, and which is a lie.
That said - It's zero degrees in Chicago! Let's talk about stuff that's cold...shall we?
1.) Girls in middle school (U-G-L-Y you ain't got no ALIBI you're UGLY, oh my god your UGLY)
2.) A nice manhattan
3.) The tiny bottom of Rosemary's baby(cute but eeeeeeevil)
4.) Gold. If you change a letter.
5.) Iceman (the Val Kilmer version - not the one that cometh)
6.) The Dairy Queen Dipcone!
7.) My cute little tootsies in the FREAKING COLD WEATHER.
8.) Catholicism
9.) Bill O'Reilly (well- he's just an asshole - but I'm considering that cold. Not like Tim Russert - who is a warm fuzzy teddybear and I heart him)
10.) CHICAGO. Ow.
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1 comment:
This is a fun game! Being a resident of Chicago i would like to add one more thing that is cold here:
-The stares we get when we are too loud at the bar, at restaurants, at the movies, at the spa....you get the idea.
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